Sunday, September 30, 2007

Tagruato | New 1-18-08 Site

It appears there is a new site entangled in this mystery we call Cloverfield. The site is for Tagruato, "a collective of top scientists, engineers, and businessmen committed to leading our investors and the whole of mankind into the future." The page loads with the graphic above, and then prompts users to choose a language. Interestingly enough, English is the only one that works.

A statement from the Tagruato Corp. CEO follows.

We regard ourselves as explorers, and believe there is much more our planet has to offer than has already been discovered. We view every challenge as an opportunity for innovation. With our groundbreaking deep-sea drilling technology, Tagruato has positioned itself to become a world leader in energy resources, medical research, advanced technology production, and consumable product.

- Ganu Yoshida

Subsidiaries of Tagruato include Bold Futura, Yoshida Medical Research, Slusho! brand happy drink, and ParafFun! Wax Distributors.
YMR is a genetic research firm specializing in deep sea bioprospecting.

Created by Tagruato C.E.O. Ganu Yoshida, Slusho! brand happy drink is a icy cool beverage that is rapidly becoming one of the company's most profitable expenditures.

Bold Futura is the contractor sector of our company principally engaged in the conception, design, manufacture and integration of advanced technology products.

ParafFUN! Wax Distributors
ParafFun! Wax Distributors meets all your wax needs.

There is a lot of information on the Tagruato Web site to decipher and investigate. But, it seems the most important aspect is that this is a corporation with "fourteen drilling rigs strategically positioned around the globe, each a billion dollar marvel of modern engineering. One, the Chuai Station, is opening in September 2007 off the east coast of North America."

According to an interactive map on the site, it's not too far from the coast of New York. I suspect this may be the cause of monster attack. Deep sea drilling might awaken the monster, and the nearest land mass to that station is NYC.

There's also a lot of chatter on the site about cancer research using deep sea ingredients. The Slusho Web site also claims to include secret deep sea ingredients. And a snippet on the Tagruato site claims the following.

Tagruato's crew of Slusho! Smilers! arrived at the Ibaraki Nursing Home in Mito yesterday with a special surprise for the feeble elders on Floor 3 - Slusho! brand happy drink! The lovely ladies handed out seven drinks to each senior in any flavor they could imagine.

"This Mikan-Strawberry Tasty makes me feel young again!” exclaimed 98-year-old Hiro Chinen.

Another aged lady asked to have a Nashi-Banana Anime hooked into her IV.

As the patients sucked their drinks down, the Slusho! Smilers! sang and danced to the Slusho! Song! Those who were able clapped along.

"I felt like a pretty angel," said longtime Smiler! Kimi. "Dancing in front of those old folks showed them that just because they cannot leave their beds, the rest of us can, and the world is still a bright shiny place."

The nursing home donation is the latest wonderful act by the Tagruato Cares charitable foundation. Other recent events include Blankets for the Homeless and Tiny Orphan's Circus Fieldtrip.

Special thanks to the folks at the Unforum and at /film for helping with this news.